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58. Dudes, Be Yourself


...Not what other people want you to be.


Once upon a time, in a land far far away... "I am Elen, the King's Guard and I sentence you to death for the atrocities you have caused, you chauvanistic murdering son of a pig. Do you have any last words before I cut off your head?" "Milk and two sugars in mine love and be quick about it."

Despite all the crap I've written about no-self and what-not, don't change yourself. Unless you want to, of course. Don't change for others.


You can't make everyone happy. And those who are pissed at something they feel you are doing, well, they probably won't be happy if you change either. There's the door. If they don't like what they see, no one's stopping them from leaving but themselves.


I'm ruling out psychopaths and a bunch of other criminals here. I'm talking regular Dudes, male and female.


I'm a regular guy but I can tell you I've had some women I once thought were special ladies, trying to get into my whites, only to tell me stuff like this...


"I'm a mirror for your own problems." - Fucking A.


"I'm right to say my opinion, to set out my borders." - Nothing's fucked here, dude. I ain't said anything.


"You make this problem mine by believing it with your mind." - right, so I believed you did what you just did, but you didn't do that, right?



Be comfortable with who you are.


Warts and all.


You deal with your own shit if you've got any, and don't take crap from people giving it out large.


Did you see the Dude cowering before the millionaire Lebowski? No. They were so off each others' radars they couldn't quite get to grips with what was going on. For a while at least. They were man-to-man. Both comfortable with who they are.


If you're a Walter, a Donny, or the Dude, you are the Swiss fuckin watch of your own life.


Let other suckers paint zeros on their own heads. Let them try to find someone better if they wish. And good luck to them.


This affects all of us, dudes.



Rev. Thomo



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