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Writer's pictureRev. Thomo

Dudeism Blog 77. Floods, Duds, & Utter Silence

Updated: Sep 17

Dudeism 77.  Floods, Duds, & Utter Silence

...or Life's pranged everyone up and we are panicking


Seriously dudes, WTF?


A long time ago when everything was black and white and a dude called Moses was carving up some tablets of knowledge for the brethren, was life so dinged up as it seems now?


Probably.


Right here, and right now is evidence of how trying to be a dude can turn out to be a dud.




Eco-shit that isn't really eco at all, & it's a Sunday and God is chilling out and saying Fuck it to all us sinners...


As you probably know, some time ago I made the genius move to leave England and live in Austria. It was a short-term plan with a view to moving to the French Pyrenees where I could live for snowboarding - but my cock got in the way, and decided to make lots of sweet love and beautiful children.


And here I am.


Not grumbling, just saying. Beware of plans, dudes. They have a way of slipping into the consciousness and then skanking you just as you like the sound of them.


No, I came here for family. But when I thought it wasn't going to happen, I had one eye on a little French apartment, and the other carving lines of goodness through the pow-wow. Yes, sure Austria has mountains, and rather pleasant ones, but I like the rugged French peaks with their bread batons and bottles of red.


I digress.


I moved here and signed up for some eco-green-earth-friendly-universal cosyness electricity. Some of it comes from wind, but heaps of it is from water power. Great. So, eco, right? The electric company is trying to be a caring dude with an ethical heart, or so it seems.


But the water needed a dam. And whatever was enjoying a splash around in some pleasant riverness, suddenly saw this big fuck-off wall appear stopping its supply of juice. And I don't know, I'm sure the water makes its way to the river through some electric whirly things and still reaches life. Well, there's a river on one side of the dam and a lake on the other. And the lake is an old one, so maybe there was a series of waterfalls tumbling down before the eco-greedheads masquerading as save-the-planet hippies bricked it up.


Well, there's a dam. And while last week was a sunny summer at around 30 degrees C, this week is a nut-shrinking 4 degrees with floods of rain and beating gales. Not the weather for flip-flops.


And we received a flood warning yesterday.


The upshot is, at some point over the next five hours, if this arctic nonsense carries on ruining picnics and trampolining, the water will overflow the dam and everything will end up at destination fucked.



Listen to the nothingness, dudes, not the somethingness


So people are being evacuated from a village further down. It has this rather beautiful wide river that meanders its way through the center. It's very open and shallow and froths and foams over boulders looking like it is going somewhere important as it slips through the woodland.


Several days of monsoon weather have turned it into a raging beast where quiet people with dark eyes stare from their doorways as it rampages ever closer, threatening to bash up their TVs and toasters.


Thankfully, the little forest stream by my garden is being rampant but not too out-of-hand. It rushes to wherever it is going with newfound enthusiasm but clearly hasn't yet arrived at the thought of swelling into my house and carrying away years of shit to the sea.



So, what's the point, dude?



If we left nature alone we might not fuck ourselves up the arse as much.


We have this great idea of blocking up water, forcing it through some turbines, holding it back, trickling it through, and generally pissing it off. We change the ecology of whatever is living downstream of the dam so that we can charge our tablets, heat our water, and enjoy the bubbles in our jacuzzis with a clean conscience.


And we slap a shit load of concrete together as a dam, we put buildings, electrical turbines, cables, fencing, roadways, and whatever, so we can be eco-friendly.


And when there's a week of too much rain, and the bleeding it off into side lakes and stuff isn't enough, and it's about to tip, and those living downstream are putting sandbags into all the cracks before they scoot off on an evacuation bus, to survive the chaos. Sounds like this story has come full circle.


There's a point to all this and I'll get to it now...


The Great Silence of mellowness is always present even when shit is hitting the fan.


In the middle of a catastrophe. At the center of noise. In the deepest whisper of our most vital wisdom, it is there. Always.


The Dude hears the noise of humanity from the perspective of Silence, and strolls at peace with a jay, a bathing robe, and a 69-cent check with a loyalty card. Quietly watching people totally out of their element.


And interesting. I never felt that this big emergency was going to happen. I could be wrong and it's still raining, but there's something about it that isn't troublesome any longer.


And I wonder, if we don't think of trouble, and simply trust in the Dude, that life will flow quite well whatever nature throws our way.


Peace.


Rev. Thomo



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